Such a great piece. I often say “unlikable female characters” but always sort of as a compliment 😂 but i do agree with your take! reminds me of one of my favorite Ottessa Moshfegh quotes:
“I wish that future novelists would reject the pressure to write for the betterment of society. Art is not media. A novel is not an “afternoon special” or fodder for the Twittersphere or material for journalists to make neat generalizations about culture. A novel is not BuzzFeed or NPR or Instagram or even Hollywood. Let’s get clear about that. A novel is a literary work of art meant to expand consciousness. We need novels that live in an amoral universe, past the political agenda described on social media. We have imaginations for a reason. Novels like American Psycho and Lolita did not poison culture. Murderous corporations and exploitive industries did. We need characters in novels to be free to range into the dark and wrong. How else will we understand ourselves?” —OTTESSA MOSHFEGH
That’s brilliant. I’ll admit, I don’t warm to her work — which is probably the point. She’s like the Egon Schiele of novelists. Not going for beauty but truth. The darker the better.
So I’ve read a few books with “unlikeable” protagonists. Usually I’m reading for myself and tend not to look at the internet’s view of said character. I found Ottessa Moshfegh’s character in MYORAR unlikeable, yes. In the Neapolitan Quartet, I didn’t find the women unlikeable, much more I found the men so. Sometimes I wonder, is it the internet’s obsession in analysing books so extensively that this has become a phenomenon since less books paint the female characters as not being able to commit any wrong? I tend to only find such hyper-fixations on the female character in said communities. Which, I may add, are dominated by women. I think even, there was a quiet movement in the online communities to read more books with bad women. Almost as if it was a point proved that women can be bad and we can write them as such.
Okay wow, you've got me thinking here. I never until this very second realized that most of the discourse around unlikeable female protagonists is BY WOMEN. Why do we do this to each other?? To ourselves? I think these books are highly popular amongst a certain group (one in which I am proudly a member 🙋🏼♀️) and I think the fact that there was a movement, like you said, was to prove women can be bad, and also to fight against the common distaste for these kinds of characters.
I agree re: The Neapolitan Quartet and MYORAR. The Men in the quartet made me want to punch a wall! Lila and Elena were frustrating but I loved them both very much.
Thanks for the note, Sulayma! You've made me think about this in a new way. 🫶🏽
Agreed- morally ambiguous men are glorified while morally ambiguous women leave the audience horrified.. If Dexter had been about a woman serial killer/psychopath for most of the show, the woman would have gotten extremely shamed, I think mostly for using a romantic relationship to seem normal, like Dexter did to Rita at first. People would not be able to let go that a woman was 'using a man' as her boyfriend to look normal. Women even catch criticism for being 'gold-diggers' when they do the grueling 24/7 childcare and housework job, while the man goes to an 8-5, off on weekends. A lot of people, women and men alike, dislike Fleabag due to her bad decisions and self destructive behavior. But haven't we all had trouble coping with life and the nuanced human experience, and the even more nuanced being a woman experience, if not to these degrees?
YES, NAILED IT! Just reading your comment makes my blood boil 🤬🤢. I haven’t watched Fleabag yet but it’s been recommended to me because it’s right up my alley. The shame and the names bestowed about the women who do what they need to for survival, when men get none of it. Ugh. It’s so frustrating!
I had never heard of “unlikeable characters” until entering the online book world, and my brain never thinks of it that way. Honestly, I think it’s asinine - I don’t read books to bestow moral judgments on characters, I read to inhabit other people’s worlds. It’s not up to me to decide what those worlds look like
💯!! This is SO on point! Even the guy in “American Psycho” — was he ever called unlikable by lit critics? Makes me want to look up reviews, but I’d rather spend that time reading a Good for Her book. 😂 Just finished Jill Ciment’s “The Body in Question,” which has a quite flawed, but NOT unlikable protagonist. Calling any protagonist unlikable shuts off nuance, and this book is full of nuance.
Right! It’s so bizarre and quite frankly, STUPID! I agree, let’s spend our time reading (and writing???) more of the Good for Her novels instead of trying to find men called unlikeable.
Luster is so good! And I did think she made dumb decisions but we all do. I mostly felt like you do you girl, I don’t know what your situation is like.
Thanks for reading! What a fun chat to start my morning.
I don’t know if I entirely agree. Cleopatra and Frankenstein by Coco Mellors immediately came to mind for me. Both extremely “unlikeable” messy characters. I would almost argue that men just aren’t written as unlikeable, as often. Evil, heinous, cheating murdering psychopaths yes - but just unlikeable? Hmm. You’ve definitely me thinking!
That is such an interesting point! Maybe we don't hear that male characters are unlikeable because they're written in other ways. I hadn't thought of that. Now you've got ME thinking!
I haven't read Cleopatra and Frankenstein yet but it's on my nightstand! I loved Blue Sisters so much. I look forward to Cleo and Frank's messiness!
Yes to all of this! And it's not just in fiction ... why has the U.S. never had a woman President? Because the majority of the voting population has found every female candidate "unlikable" for the exact same reasons they have voted for their male counterparts ... for leadership!
This is a great topic and one that my book group often discusses. It's rarely as satisfying (for me) to read a novel with a so-called likable female protagonist. I'd like to recast "unlikable" as complex, contradictory, and maybe even maddening. All good things in a novel. Sometimes the character is so unlikable that she becomes likable, like the lead in Olga Tokarczuk's Drive Your Plow Over the Bones of the Dead, and maybe Olive Kitteridge (though I found it hard not to like Olive from the get-go). No matter, even the fact that there are discussions about likable and unlikable heroines —in fiction!— just proves how deeply entrenched sexism remains. Thank you for this fascinating discussion.
I vote for the recast to complex, contradictory, and maddening! Yeah it is wild to me that these discussions happen about FAKE WOMEN. Thank you for reading and discussing this with me!
Also, I love Olive so much 🥹 She's so persnickety.
Oh my, this is stretching my brain and I love it! You're spot on; I'd never realized that male protagonists are allowed to be unlikeable (and are rarely labeled as such). Now I can't unsee it.
Also, I'm currently reading The Let Them Theory by Mel Robbins (audiobook), The Lost Bookshop by Evie Woods (digital), and Set Boundaries, Find Peace by Nedra Glover Tawwab (hard copy). :)
Lovely post! I absolutely agree that we as readers, need to ‘defend’ (I probably shouldn’t use this word) these so-called unlikeable characters. They may make bad decisions, different from social norms and overreact. But that’s what makes them realistic and relatable!
YES! Not to mention interesting. Thank you so much for reading. And I do think we can use the word defend when talking about these “unlikeable” protagonists!
Such good points! I think I've fallen into the pitfall of explaining a female presenting character as "unlikeable" as a really quick summary but it really doesn't do them fairness. I forget that being "unlikeable" is not always a compliment as I strive to be that kind of person in a lot of ways. But as you pointed out, us human beings are constantly faced with tough decisions and can't exist to be someone's favorite person 24/7. I always like to pitch these types of books as me "supporting women's wrongs" but honestly I think I'm just tired of so much media celebrating "men's wrongs".
YES oh my god, I'm so tired of it too. Society shows us that no man can be bad enough and no woman can be good enough. It's so tiresome, so demeaning. I love that you strive to be that kind of person (and same!)
When I was writing my novel and looking for comparable titles, the term I used to search was “unlikeable female protagonist.” But I think you are right, it turns out my protagonist isn’t unlikable. She’s just making bad decisions due to a history of trauma. Some think that she is unnecessarily mean but the interesting thing is that they also understand her. Who among us isn’t a bit messed up?
Such a great piece. I often say “unlikable female characters” but always sort of as a compliment 😂 but i do agree with your take! reminds me of one of my favorite Ottessa Moshfegh quotes:
“I wish that future novelists would reject the pressure to write for the betterment of society. Art is not media. A novel is not an “afternoon special” or fodder for the Twittersphere or material for journalists to make neat generalizations about culture. A novel is not BuzzFeed or NPR or Instagram or even Hollywood. Let’s get clear about that. A novel is a literary work of art meant to expand consciousness. We need novels that live in an amoral universe, past the political agenda described on social media. We have imaginations for a reason. Novels like American Psycho and Lolita did not poison culture. Murderous corporations and exploitive industries did. We need characters in novels to be free to range into the dark and wrong. How else will we understand ourselves?” —OTTESSA MOSHFEGH
A literary work of art meant to expand consciousness. Brilliant! I hadn’t read this quote and I love it soooo much. Thank you EJ!
“we have imaginations for a reason” UGH SO GOOD! im so glad you liked it, i thought you might 💗📚
I mean!!! It’s fabulous!
That’s brilliant. I’ll admit, I don’t warm to her work — which is probably the point. She’s like the Egon Schiele of novelists. Not going for beauty but truth. The darker the better.
The darker the better 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
So I’ve read a few books with “unlikeable” protagonists. Usually I’m reading for myself and tend not to look at the internet’s view of said character. I found Ottessa Moshfegh’s character in MYORAR unlikeable, yes. In the Neapolitan Quartet, I didn’t find the women unlikeable, much more I found the men so. Sometimes I wonder, is it the internet’s obsession in analysing books so extensively that this has become a phenomenon since less books paint the female characters as not being able to commit any wrong? I tend to only find such hyper-fixations on the female character in said communities. Which, I may add, are dominated by women. I think even, there was a quiet movement in the online communities to read more books with bad women. Almost as if it was a point proved that women can be bad and we can write them as such.
Okay wow, you've got me thinking here. I never until this very second realized that most of the discourse around unlikeable female protagonists is BY WOMEN. Why do we do this to each other?? To ourselves? I think these books are highly popular amongst a certain group (one in which I am proudly a member 🙋🏼♀️) and I think the fact that there was a movement, like you said, was to prove women can be bad, and also to fight against the common distaste for these kinds of characters.
I agree re: The Neapolitan Quartet and MYORAR. The Men in the quartet made me want to punch a wall! Lila and Elena were frustrating but I loved them both very much.
Thanks for the note, Sulayma! You've made me think about this in a new way. 🫶🏽
Agreed- morally ambiguous men are glorified while morally ambiguous women leave the audience horrified.. If Dexter had been about a woman serial killer/psychopath for most of the show, the woman would have gotten extremely shamed, I think mostly for using a romantic relationship to seem normal, like Dexter did to Rita at first. People would not be able to let go that a woman was 'using a man' as her boyfriend to look normal. Women even catch criticism for being 'gold-diggers' when they do the grueling 24/7 childcare and housework job, while the man goes to an 8-5, off on weekends. A lot of people, women and men alike, dislike Fleabag due to her bad decisions and self destructive behavior. But haven't we all had trouble coping with life and the nuanced human experience, and the even more nuanced being a woman experience, if not to these degrees?
YES, NAILED IT! Just reading your comment makes my blood boil 🤬🤢. I haven’t watched Fleabag yet but it’s been recommended to me because it’s right up my alley. The shame and the names bestowed about the women who do what they need to for survival, when men get none of it. Ugh. It’s so frustrating!
I had never heard of “unlikeable characters” until entering the online book world, and my brain never thinks of it that way. Honestly, I think it’s asinine - I don’t read books to bestow moral judgments on characters, I read to inhabit other people’s worlds. It’s not up to me to decide what those worlds look like
Thanks for sharing your thoughts!
Right! It’s not our job to bestow that judgement. Our job is to enter a new world. Beautifully said! Thank you for reading, Shruti!
💯!! This is SO on point! Even the guy in “American Psycho” — was he ever called unlikable by lit critics? Makes me want to look up reviews, but I’d rather spend that time reading a Good for Her book. 😂 Just finished Jill Ciment’s “The Body in Question,” which has a quite flawed, but NOT unlikable protagonist. Calling any protagonist unlikable shuts off nuance, and this book is full of nuance.
Right! It’s so bizarre and quite frankly, STUPID! I agree, let’s spend our time reading (and writing???) more of the Good for Her novels instead of trying to find men called unlikeable.
Luster is so good! And I did think she made dumb decisions but we all do. I mostly felt like you do you girl, I don’t know what your situation is like.
Thanks for reading! What a fun chat to start my morning.
PS. I loved “Luster” — though I did want to throttle her for some of her decisions. 😂
I don’t know if I entirely agree. Cleopatra and Frankenstein by Coco Mellors immediately came to mind for me. Both extremely “unlikeable” messy characters. I would almost argue that men just aren’t written as unlikeable, as often. Evil, heinous, cheating murdering psychopaths yes - but just unlikeable? Hmm. You’ve definitely me thinking!
That is such an interesting point! Maybe we don't hear that male characters are unlikeable because they're written in other ways. I hadn't thought of that. Now you've got ME thinking!
I haven't read Cleopatra and Frankenstein yet but it's on my nightstand! I loved Blue Sisters so much. I look forward to Cleo and Frank's messiness!
Yes to all of this! And it's not just in fiction ... why has the U.S. never had a woman President? Because the majority of the voting population has found every female candidate "unlikable" for the exact same reasons they have voted for their male counterparts ... for leadership!
🤦🏽♀️🤦🏽♀️🤦🏽♀️🤦🏽♀️🤦🏽♀️
This is a great topic and one that my book group often discusses. It's rarely as satisfying (for me) to read a novel with a so-called likable female protagonist. I'd like to recast "unlikable" as complex, contradictory, and maybe even maddening. All good things in a novel. Sometimes the character is so unlikable that she becomes likable, like the lead in Olga Tokarczuk's Drive Your Plow Over the Bones of the Dead, and maybe Olive Kitteridge (though I found it hard not to like Olive from the get-go). No matter, even the fact that there are discussions about likable and unlikable heroines —in fiction!— just proves how deeply entrenched sexism remains. Thank you for this fascinating discussion.
I vote for the recast to complex, contradictory, and maddening! Yeah it is wild to me that these discussions happen about FAKE WOMEN. Thank you for reading and discussing this with me!
Also, I love Olive so much 🥹 She's so persnickety.
Oh my, this is stretching my brain and I love it! You're spot on; I'd never realized that male protagonists are allowed to be unlikeable (and are rarely labeled as such). Now I can't unsee it.
Also, I'm currently reading The Let Them Theory by Mel Robbins (audiobook), The Lost Bookshop by Evie Woods (digital), and Set Boundaries, Find Peace by Nedra Glover Tawwab (hard copy). :)
YES! We love some good brain stretching. Now that you can't unsee it, it's going to show up everywhere.
I haven't read any of those books! Are you enjoying them??
Yes, all for different reasons! :) I find the dark winter months to be my favorite time of year to read self-empowerment books. Watering my roots. :)
I love that so much!! ✨✨
Lovely post! I absolutely agree that we as readers, need to ‘defend’ (I probably shouldn’t use this word) these so-called unlikeable characters. They may make bad decisions, different from social norms and overreact. But that’s what makes them realistic and relatable!
YES! Not to mention interesting. Thank you so much for reading. And I do think we can use the word defend when talking about these “unlikeable” protagonists!
Such good points! I think I've fallen into the pitfall of explaining a female presenting character as "unlikeable" as a really quick summary but it really doesn't do them fairness. I forget that being "unlikeable" is not always a compliment as I strive to be that kind of person in a lot of ways. But as you pointed out, us human beings are constantly faced with tough decisions and can't exist to be someone's favorite person 24/7. I always like to pitch these types of books as me "supporting women's wrongs" but honestly I think I'm just tired of so much media celebrating "men's wrongs".
YES oh my god, I'm so tired of it too. Society shows us that no man can be bad enough and no woman can be good enough. It's so tiresome, so demeaning. I love that you strive to be that kind of person (and same!)
Kolina, yes yes yes, you are spot on the money here 👏🏽
Thank you! I wish I wasn’t 🤣
😆😆 too true!
When I was writing my novel and looking for comparable titles, the term I used to search was “unlikeable female protagonist.” But I think you are right, it turns out my protagonist isn’t unlikable. She’s just making bad decisions due to a history of trauma. Some think that she is unnecessarily mean but the interesting thing is that they also understand her. Who among us isn’t a bit messed up?
Exactly! Literally everyone has a little trauma and acts accordingly. The label infuriates me. I love that you used that term to search for comps! 🤣👏🏽
BRAVA!
Ahhh the unlikable female protagonist is the one I like best.
ME TOO!
Those of us who write these “unlikable” female protagonists are often criticized, too. Thank you for your post and shining light on the subject.
Oh absolutely! Thank you for reading!